Anonymous asked:

“Do you have a undying sexual desire for castles? It seems that you really liked Fan Castle, and wanted to do activities that would involve in the methods of reproduction, but what was your emotional reaction when Lord Guan Yu of Shu attacked your beautiful castle? Also, what was your other reaction when Wu's Horse General, Lu Meng came to join in the methods of reproduction? Did Fan Castle had a new born that would eventually grow into a larger one?”

Castles appeal to my protective nature and a certain appreciation of grandeur. There is an undeniable allure in thick walls of packed earth, in flags rising high on the ramparts, in gates opened wide to new friends and shut tight against intruders. Perhaps my affinity for these structures is greater than mere professional concern, and perhaps this is why I take such offense at the rumor that I considered retreating when Guan Yu attacked. At that point, Fancheng had been my home base for a good several years. I had been committed to its safety from the very first day. Some of my advisers feared that defense would be futile. I cannot help but toot my own war horn at proving my instincts correct.

Lu Meng played his part in the campaign by sneaking into Jing from behind, bringing the province to its knees without a single civilian death. In admiration for such disciplined bloodlessness and steadfast refusal of reward, I found a mutually pleasurable way to return the favor. Some months later, I received reports of an odd structure arisen in the east. I cannot say with certainty that it resulted from our diplomatic intercourse, but I have my suspicions.