I believe these are considered my Pokeymans
(Source: rampart-sign)
20. May 2012
13. May 2012
CAO REN WITH CLAWS HO CRAP!!!
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW lol
I finally submitted to Zhang He’s offer of a new look. Though not sure I can accustom myself to fighting without a shield, I must say I am pleased.
9. May 2012
Anonymous asked:
“From that condom ad I understood that you have an ungodly stone-hard erection. Am I correct?”
I have a certain passion in my loincloth, and I do not hesitate to show it.
7. May 2012
In answer to: What do you think of Wu?
That awkward feeling that somewhere out there, Xiahou Dun might be masturbating to you…
Don’t be naiive, Zhou Yu. Everyone in Wei masturbates to you. And daydreams about you and Lu Xun having a naked pillow fight in nothing but your bras and panties (as ineffectual as said garments may be on you both).
Actually, I dream of Gongjin having a nude sword fight with Lu Meng.
(I then enact retribution on cousin Yuan for typing my secret confessions into my ask blog on the singular occasion I left my computer unlocked.)
5. May 2012
Anonymous asked:
“Is there a underlying reason you are called "The Rock", lord Cao Ren?”
My recent endeavors in product sponsorship might bear some relation to that nickname.
5. May 2012
Enjoy the next batch of alphabet cards, and rest assured that Yuan has earned some unprintable retribution for the worst of his comments.
(via rydain)
18. April 2012
Anonymous asked:
“Master Cao Ren, what is your opinions on Master Cao Hong?”
Cousin Hong has little control over his mouth or his men. I’m unsure how he succeeds in battle with such ill discipline, but I suppose it is a credit to his leadership ability. Hong does have a streak of duty and humility, shown when he gave up his horse to ensure Lord Cao Cao’s safe retreat. Perhaps this sensibility shines brighter than his arrogance.
12. April 2012
Showing my battle fury and enormous shield in Romance of the Three Kingdoms 12.
7. April 2012
Anonymous asked:
“Do you have a undying sexual desire for castles? It seems that you really liked Fan Castle, and wanted to do activities that would involve in the methods of reproduction, but what was your emotional reaction when Lord Guan Yu of Shu attacked your beautiful castle? Also, what was your other reaction when Wu's Horse General, Lu Meng came to join in the methods of reproduction? Did Fan Castle had a new born that would eventually grow into a larger one?”
Castles appeal to my protective nature and a certain appreciation of grandeur. There is an undeniable allure in thick walls of packed earth, in flags rising high on the ramparts, in gates opened wide to new friends and shut tight against intruders. Perhaps my affinity for these structures is greater than mere professional concern, and perhaps this is why I take such offense at the rumor that I considered retreating when Guan Yu attacked. At that point, Fancheng had been my home base for a good several years. I had been committed to its safety from the very first day. Some of my advisers feared that defense would be futile. I cannot help but toot my own war horn at proving my instincts correct.
Lu Meng played his part in the campaign by sneaking into Jing from behind, bringing the province to its knees without a single civilian death. In admiration for such disciplined bloodlessness and steadfast refusal of reward, I found a mutually pleasurable way to return the favor. Some months later, I received reports of an odd structure arisen in the east. I cannot say with certainty that it resulted from our diplomatic intercourse, but I have my suspicions.
31. March 2012
askzhouyu asked:
“How are you enjoying your new tanuki form? I keep resisting the urge to look in your pants.”
I must say it is trying my patience. Perhaps I can harness its vagaries to blow off steam. Do forgive the pun.
My visibility is limited. My breastplate is polished to a mirror shine from good luck rubs. There is also the matter of a dance that Yuan constantly requests from me.
